Diplomacy in overdrive at the royal funeral

The fictional aide Bernard Woolley in the
long running series Yes, Prime Minister
 

British diplomats and officials were battling with the rare challenge of assembling a vast  number of foreign dignitaries in one place at short notice for the funeral of Queen Elizabeth II, Britain's longest-reigning monarch. 

It has been not unlike herding cats as the niceties of diplomacy have made it almost an impossible task without upsetting at least some of the invited VIPs.

Obviously, the invites were all sent at short notice and to plan ahead of time for who, where they would sit and how they would travel has been a massive headache due to the ever changing flux of global events and diplomacy. 

It has been 57 years since Britain’s last state funeral of former UK prime minister and wartime leader Winston Churchill and the world is a very different place now.

Around 500 presidents, prime ministers, kings, queens, emirs and other world dignitaries were invited.   

Probably the easiest call was not to invite Russian President Vladimir Putin because of Ukraine and the savage sanctions the UK has slapped on his country. Putin ally Belarusian President Aleksandr Lukashenko was similarly not on the guestlist. 

Despite Putin being almost a global pariah, a Russian official said it was "deeply immoral" the UK snubbed Putin. Although Putin did send King Charles III a telegram wishing him "courage and perseverance in the face of this heavy, irreparable loss."

China’s President Xi Jinping was on the guest list although there was uproar amongst some British Members of Parliament when this became known, who described the decision as “extraordinary”. 

Xi decided not to attend but Vice President Wang Qishan will attend the funeral.

Saudi Arabia's crown prince Mohammed Bin Salman was invited but did not attend. His visit would hvae been controversial because of the murder of journalist and Saudi critic Jamal Khashoggi in 2018. 

More recently, Saudi Arabia sentenced Nourah bint Saeed al-Qahtani to 45 years in prison and Salma al-Shehab, a 34-year-old PhD student at Leeds University and mother of two to 35 years for comments they made on social media which were deemed as illegal as they criticised the regime. This caused much controversy in the UK and the media made much play of the fact the new King Charles III has close ties with Saudi Arabia.

The ever controversial Islamic Republic of Iran, long the subject of international sanctions over its nuclear programme, received a partial invite and was represented only at ambassadorial level.

Others not on the guestlist include Syria, Venezuela and Afghanistan as the UK does not have full diplomatic relations with the three and Myanmar were also not invited broadly because of the recent coup d'etat and attendant human rights abuses.

The Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK) and Nicaragua had been invited to send only ambassadors, not heads of state. Britain has diplomatic issues with both countries.

However, the guestlist is a fairly easy side of the funeral’s diplomatic conundrum.

To show off its green credentials the UK government also asked VIPs to limit their numbers of delegates and consider commercial flights to reduce congestion at Heathrow. It’s certain this would have annoyed those with private jets they are more used to scooting about in. 

Then there are the buses, yes buses. President Joe Biden has been allowed to bring his mammoth armoured car - better known as The Beast - but other dignitaries have been asked to jump out of their private cars at a meeting point and then climb aboard buses to the service at Westminster Abbey. 

It looks like this request created more than a bit of an uproar as a British prime minister’s official spokesman insisted arrangements for leaders would “vary depending on individual circumstances” and that the information provided was “guidance.” Obviously it was a step too far for many countries, most notably Japan. 

Japanese Emperor Naruhito and Empress Masako broke protocol and attended the funeral, as a measure of the close ties he and his family enjoyed with the late Queen Elizabeth. Although I find it hard to imagine the Emperor and Empress climbing aboard a bus with a bunch of other invitees. 

Then, not least, there are the seating arrangements in Westminster Abbey which can hold around 2000 people. South Korea sitting next to Japan, perhaps not! Pakistan and Afghanistan, er no! US and Mexico, maybe not the best idea! Israel and pretty much any Middle Eastern country, no, no! India and Pakistan, definitely not!

There are, of course many, many more and diplomats would have been working long into the night to get the seating arrangements right. 

In fact this exact situation was the subject of a very popular and long-running TV series which ran in the 1980s called Yes Prime Minister which parodied the workings of the British Parliament.

In the episode ‘A Diplomatic Incident’ which amply demonstrates the changing nature of geopolitics, the death of fictional Prime Minister Jim Hacker's predecessor provides a chance for some negotiations with France over the Channel Tunnel at his state funeral.

One scene has his hapless and harried aide, Bernard Woolley, is shouting down the phone “Yes there are about 10 Prime Ministers flying in today, Special Branch are going crazy, so is the band of the Royal Marines who have got to play all the national anthems. It’s lucky Argentina isn’t coming,  not because of the Falklands (War) but because their anthem goes on for about 10 minutes”.

From the same scene. “No we can’t have alphabetical seating in the Abbey, you’d have Iraq and Iran sitting next to each other, plus Israel and Jordan all sitting in the same pew. You’d be in danger of starting World War III.”

Taiwan said its representative in London, Kelly Wu-Chiao Hsieh, was “specially invited” to sign the condolence book at Lancaster House, which is run by the UK Foreign Office.  

The Taiwan Foreign Ministry said the invitation came “based on the importance attached to Taiwan-Britain relations and the precious friendship between the two peoples”. 

The ministry noted Hsieh “enjoyed the same treatment as the heads of state, representatives and members of the royal family of other countries who have gone to Britain to mourn”.

Tinkerty Tonk...