中文在最下方
If you don’t find Terry Kuo funny, you have no sense of humour.
This strutting buffoon plays his role as one of Taiwan’s leading joke politicians so well that part of me hopes he sticks around a while longer. If he wasn’t so politically dim as to be potentially dangerous for Taiwan if he gets any real power, that is.
His latest drivel had me chuckling, as it again reminded me of the kind of pompous and arrogant Chinese rhetoric we have heard over the years. It is also akin to the kind of gaslighting China is a past-master at, like the “When did patient zero begin in the US?” from Chinese foreign ministry spokesman Zhao Lijian in a now-infamous tweet. “It might be the U.S. army who brought the epidemic to Wuhan.”
Absurd, yes, but that is Terry Kuo all over. His latest piece of colossal overstatement and rather sad gaslighting attempt being “The self-righteous goodwill of the DPP government is leading the people to a dark hell where it is multi difficult to even eat an egg.”
I mean, it’s not even good gaslighting. His minders should really have a word with him to raise his game.
Aside from not being true, as there are eggs to be had without too much difficulty, no one is in a “Dark Hell” because they didn’t get their breakfast egg. It’s clownish in its absurdity because the overstatement is akin to the big red nose, huge yellow curly wig, massive shoes and baggy striped trousers that Coco usually wears to make the children laugh.
Take a look at the UK where bird flu has also created a bit of a shortage of eggs and supermarket racks are devoid of certain vegetables. The shortages - which are affecting Ireland too - are largely the result of extreme weather in Spain and north Africa, where floods, snow and hail have affected harvests. Yep, really nothing to do with the government and politicians and the media are saying that.
Contrast that with news that Taiwan's foreign minister Joseph Wu and the country’s top security people are in Washington for a meeting with US officials. The local press lead with Kuo’s eggs nonsense and not the more vital issues that keep us all safe from oppression.
To directly quote the Foxconn Wikipedia page. “While headquartered in Taiwan, the company earns the majority of its revenue from assets in mainland China.
Speaking of vegetables, pea-brain Terry wants to pitch again for the presidential nomination. Having thrown a toddler-like tantrum the last time the KMT decided not to go with him, when he threw his toys out of his pram and stalked away to sulk for a few years, he seems to think he’s in for another shot.
If the KMT are smart (no guarantees there I guess) they will ignore this political has-been.
Kuo revealed he had once been instructed by the sea goddess Mazu in a dream to run as a candidate in the 2020 presidential election…So she would approve if he just retired to somewhere nice on the coast and went fishing all day. (Hey, Terry…the thin bit of the rod points towards the sea…you hold the thick end.)
Tinkerty Tonk…
如果你不覺得郭台銘有趣，那你就沒有幽默感。
這個大搖大擺的小丑，把台灣主要政治笑話的角色之一演得很好，我希望他能多待一陣子，前提是如果他在政治上不至於獲得任何實權，然後對台灣構成潛在危險的話。
他最近的胡說八道讓我咯咯地笑了起來，因為這再次讓我想起了多年來聽到的那種華而不實、傲慢自大的中國言論。類似於中國過去擅長的那種煤氣燈效應，比如「美國什麼時候開始出現零號病人？」這句話來自中國外交部發言人趙立堅的推文。「可能是美軍把疫情帶到了武漢。」
荒謬嗎？的確，但那就是目前看到的郭台銘。他最新誇張且相當可悲的煤氣燈效應煽動手段是：「民進黨政府自以為是的善意，何嘗不是把老百姓帶往連吃一顆蛋都困難重重的黑暗地獄當中？」
我想說的是，這甚至不是很好的煤氣燈效應！他的幕僚們真的應該把他拉到一邊提醒他一下，以提高他參賽的水準。
除了雞蛋不是困難重重才能吃到，根本不會有人會因為早餐沒吃到雞蛋就陷入「黑暗地獄」。這種荒謬可笑，就像是小丑戴著大紅鼻子、黃色捲曲假髮、笨重的鞋子和寬鬆條紋褲，他們通常穿戴這些來逗孩子們笑。
看看英國，那裡的禽流感也造成了雞蛋短缺，超市貨架上連蔬菜也沒有。 短缺也影響到愛爾蘭，主要原因還有西班牙和北非的極端天氣，洪水、雪和冰雹影響了收成。是的，真的與政府無關，英國的政治人物和媒體一致同意。
在台灣與雞蛋新聞形成鮮明對比的是，台灣外交部長吳釗燮和高層國安人員正在華盛頓與美國官員會面。然而台灣媒體卻是大篇幅報導郭的雞蛋胡說八道，關心的程度遠超過這個對我們所有人更重要的台美議題。
我查了一下富士康的維基百科頁面：雖然總部位於台灣，該公司的大部分收入來自中國的資產。 嗯，我一直很喜歡 FoxConn 這個名字的諷刺意味，因為 con 在英文裡的意思。
言歸正傳說到蔬菜，我就想到一個英文的形容詞 pea-brain，是用來形容很笨的人。這個豌豆腦上次因為國民黨決定不提名他，他就像蹣跚學步的孩子一樣大發脾氣，把玩具從嬰兒車裡扔出來，然後大步走開。悶氣生了幾年後，他好像認為他的機會又來了。
如果國民黨很聰明（我猜這無法保證），他們應該忽略這種政治上的過去式。我們等著瞧吧。
郭台銘說過，他曾在夢中得到媽祖的指點，要他參選2020總統大選。我想如果他退休後到海邊的某個好地方整天去釣魚，媽祖應該會同意，不過媽祖可能會指點他：嘿，Terry，釣竿比較細的一端要指向大海，你應該握住比較粗的那一端。
掰掰。
