Showing posts with label From the Adopted Brit.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label From the Adopted Brit.. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 4, 2023

Billy Big Banana

(中文在下方)

Some people in a position of power get so affected by the environment they inhabit that their grip on the realities of normal life ebb away. At the same time the tide of their ego, sense of entitlement and sense of importance washes in. 

The way most journalists treat them with a degree of respect only serves to boost their conceit even more. In their heads, nothing is ever more important than them. 

They strut around like Billy Big Banana pontificating on subjects they know nothing about and gaslight the public on make-believe issues actually believing their God-like status in society somehow makes it OK to lie and misdirect. 

There are only a few who do this, thank God. You know who they are. 

But it worries me they seem to constantly get away and the press does not call them out in any kind of effective or meaningful way.

My hope is this unholy cabal of individuals will be soon be properly exposed for what and who they are.

Tinkerty Tonk...

一些處於權力地位的人因為受到他們所處環境的影響,他們的自我、權利感和重要性無限膨脹,最後他們逐漸無法面對現實,以為自己就是那麼重要。

大多數記者以一定程度的尊重對待這些政治人物,但這只是進一步助長他們的自負傲慢。在這些人的腦海裡,沒有什麼比自己更重要。

他們就像比利大香蕉 (Billy Big Banana 給可笑自我膨脹的人取的名字) 一樣,大搖大擺地談論他們一無所知的話題,並在虛構的議題上煽動民眾,進而讓民眾誤信他們自以為在社會中如上帝般的地位,隨意撒謊和誤導。

感謝上帝,只有少數人這樣做,你知道他們是誰。

但讓我擔心的是,他們似乎總是可以毫髮無傷全身而退,媒體並沒有以任何有效或有意義的方式把他們揪出來。

我希望這些邪惡的人的真面目,能夠很快地被正確揭穿。

掰掰。

Houdini the Fei Fei - doomed by official incompetence

(中文在下方)
Sadly for Houdini the Fei Fei, Taiwan’s famous escape artist and fugitive, his days on the run came to an abrupt end last week in a maelstrom of official misunderstanding and incompetence.

Alec Issigonis, designer of the Mini car in 1959, famously said, “A camel is a horse designed by committee.” The Mini became one of the most successful cars of all time.

So he knew a thing or two about design and outcomes. 

Sadly, the simple task of a capture of an escaped Baboon was organised by a committee of local officials. 

The miserable demise of Houdini who was shot to death in a rural homestead by an overzealous hunter acting on behalf of the local council, has been mourned across the country. It is a timely reminder that we are effectively governed on many levels by incompetents. 

There will, of course, be an inquiry, but it is obvious that the myriad people involved in the hunt were not communicating properly with each other. There was no clear chain of command, instructions as to the required outcome were not passed down and confusion reigned for days before the tragic outcome.  

Compounding all this was the unseemly rush to claim credit for Houdini’s capture to the extent of congratulatory selfies being taken over his dead body as he lay sadly curled up in a net, presumably bleeding out.

These were soon replaced by pictures of officials bowing in apology over Houdini’s flower-draped ‘coffin’. What an unedifying display of official self-aggrandisement one minute, quickly replaced with an admission of utter uselessness on the other. 

Poor Houdini never really stood a chance against these buffoons who were apparently more interested in their own image than they were in a positive outcome in terms of both public safety and the interests of a member of a non-native animal far from its natural home. 

Unfortunately there is a deficiency of analytical thinking skills across all levels of officialdom which never ceases to depress us all. It does, of course, also exist in the commercial world but at least there incompetent people tend to be weeded out more quickly as the level of accountability tends to be much higher. Companies just can’t survive if staff are ineffective.

I was a director of a small company which was an offshoot of the multinational company I worked for and believe me, the Director’s Responsibility Manual is huge. It contains legal requirements on behaviour and you can end up in court if you are negligent or slipshod in the role.    
 
Sadly for us taxpayers, a lot of officials, particularly at lower levels of the administration are more able to more easily hide in the herd of those around them, much like Wildebeest and shoal fish seek safety in numbers to confuse and baffle predators. 

Ministers and Heads of Departments resign and take ultimate responsibility when something goes wrong on their particular patch. Take the Puyuma train crash in 2018 when Minister of Communications Wu Hongmou resigned two months after the incident. From what I have read about the disaster many of Wu’s underlings were held accountable for the incident but he rightly resigned because he was in charge when it happened, although he was not directly involved in it’s cause. 

That said, the trend of stepping up, taking responsibility, being accountable and acting ethically is ebbing away and I hope this does not happen in Taiwan, although I fear it will given the more unscrupulous actions of some politicians in the recent past. As I have written before some are taking their lead from the likes of Donald Trump and Boris Johnson who brazenly dish out blame for failure to anyone but themselves. 

A phrase far more prevalent in the UK media recently has been “Mr A pushes Mr B under a  bus”. Which is generally applied to a politician who has dumped blame on an underling for a mistake they were ultimately accountable for.

After Prime Minister Liz Truss made a huge mistake in pushing for massive tax cuts the country could not afford crashed financial markets and was forced into an embarrassing U-turn, she simply blamed Finance Minister Kwasi Kwarteng, and refused to take responsibility. 

“Truss throws Kwasi Kwarteng under a bus” shouted the Evening Standard newspaper front page the same day. Truss resigned soon after, but nevertheless she tried to shift the blame to Kwerteng in an attempt to survive.

Does former president Trump throw people under a bus to avoid being accountable? Just ask his former lawyer, Rudy Giuliani who is facing a $2.7 billion lawsuit for defending Trump’s conspiracy theories over vote rigging during the 2020 election. Or his former fixer and lawyer, Michael Cohen who is currently giving evidence to the grand jury investigating the former president after doing three years in prison for Trump related crimes.   

It’s all part of the post-truth and lack of accountability era we live in and I would hate to see that infection gaining a larger foothold on these shores.

Errors of judgement have always happened and will continue to happen. There are names for it. In Britain and America it is commonly known as Murphy’s Law which holds that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. (It is really an aphorism but is attributed to many different people).

In military slang S.N.A.F.U (Situation Normal - All F**ked Up, or more politely Situation Normal - All Fouled Up) is defined in the dictionary as meaning a situation marked by errors or confusion.

In the commercial world I inhabited for most of my career, goals were clearly set and thought given to how to achieve that goal and various ‘owners’ assigned for the various stages involved who were accountable for their part and also the end result. The overall project would have a single ‘owner’ who would be accountable for the outcome, be it positive or negative.   

You have to wonder, when you look at the apparent chaotic way some politicians and officials approach problems, whether they are lazy, do not care, or more interested in covering their tracks in case there is a S.N.A.F.U.

狒狒胡迪尼的啟示:官方無能造成的悲劇

2023 年 3 月 31 日 597 人閱讀

胡迪尼(Harry Houdini, 1874-1926)是一位匈牙利裔美國魔術師和特技演員,以逃脫表演而流傳後世,我們姑且把最近不幸在台灣辭世的狒狒取名為胡迪尼。

逃脫藝術家狒狒胡迪尼最近佔據了台灣網路和媒體的版面,給人們在無趣的日常中帶來許多歡樂。但在官方誤解與無能的漩渦中,最後胡迪尼跑進桃園一間民宅,被自述為受僱於一個地方政府的獵人槍殺。

胡迪尼戲劇性的離世在台灣引起廣泛的震驚和哀悼,在我看來,這是一個及時的提醒:在許多層面上,我們都只是被無能者治理,而且他們爭相推諉責任。

群體決策可能的盲點

1959年Mini的設計師依斯哥尼斯(Alec Issigonis)有句名言:駱駝是委員會設計的馬(A camel is a horse designed by a committee)。意思是委員會常常將太多相互衝突或缺乏經驗的意見,納入單項計劃之中,精準批評了群體決策以及抽象或無關的管理主義。Mini是有史以來最成功的汽車之一。

胡迪尼死亡事件當然會有個調查,也會有個結論到底這是如何發生的,但很明顯參與尋找胡迪尼的無數人,彼此之間應該沒有好好的溝通,沒有明確的指揮鏈與指引,或是關於預計結果所需的指示,從來沒有清楚下達。可以想見悲劇發生之前的幾天裡,混亂一直存在。

讓這一切雪上加霜的是,胡迪尼被尋穫後,官員急於聲稱那是自己的功勞,以至於當胡迪尼可憐地蜷縮在一張網中時,可能正在大量流血的他竟然成為自拍的目標。

而這些炫耀的自拍,很快就被官員們向胡迪尼棺材獻花行禮的照片取代了;前一分鐘得意洋洋自我膨脹,下一分鐘灰頭土臉完全無用。

可憐的胡迪尼從未真正有機會與這些小丑對抗,這些小丑顯然對自己的形象更感興趣,他們不在乎公共安全,或是那些遠離自然家園的非本土動物。

各級官場都缺乏分析的思維能力,真是令人感到沮喪。當然這也存在於商業世界,但至少在商業世界,不稱職的人往往會很快被淘汰,因為這些公司對責任的要求往往比較高,因為如果員工效率低下,公司將無法生存。

我曾經是一家小公司的董事,那是路透社的一家當地分支機構,相信我,董事的責任手冊非常厚,包含對所有行為的法律要求。如果你在這個角色中疏忽或馬虎,最終可能會上法庭。

低階官員極易躲藏在人群中

對我們納稅人來說可悲的是,許多官員,尤其是級別較低的政府官員,更容易隱藏在他們周圍的人群中,就像牛羚和淺灘魚為了避免捕食者,就躲藏在大數量的同類中來尋求庇護。

出現問題時,通常部長和部門負責人辭職並承擔最終責任。我搜尋到的資料顯示在 2018 年,台灣交通部長吳宏謀在普悠瑪火車事故發生兩個月後辭職。 2021年太魯閣號出軌事件後,交通部長林佳龍一樣辭職。這些辭職是正確的,因為他們在事故發生時負責,儘管他沒有直接參與事故的起因。

正如我之前多次所寫,目前我們看見的是挺身而出、承擔責任、問責和道德行事的趨勢,正在世界各地漸漸消退。例如美國前總統川普(Donald Trump)和英國前首相強生(Boris Johnson),他們總是厚顏無恥地將失敗的責任推給除了他們自己以外的任何人。我希望這不會在台灣發生,但是鑑於最近一些政客肆無忌憚的行為,我想台灣也躲不過。

最近在英國媒體很流行的一句話是:A先生將B先生推到公共汽車輪下。這適用於將責任歸咎於下屬的政客,而需要要為錯誤負責的其實是他們。

政客常將其他人扔到公共汽車輪下

例如英國前首相特拉斯(Liz Truss)在推動大規模減稅方面犯下巨大錯誤,導致金融市場無法承受幾近崩潰,接著被迫陷入尷尬的政策大轉彎,然而她指責財政部長克瓦騰(Kwasi Kwarteng),拒絕承擔責任。

晚報頭條是:特拉斯將克瓦騰扔到一輛公共汽車輪下!之後特拉斯很快就辭職了,但她仍然試圖將責任推給克瓦騰,以求在日後在政壇繼續生存。

美國前總統川普會把人扔到公共汽車下以避免被追究責任嗎? 問問他的前律師朱利安尼(Rudy Giuliani) 就知道了。他因為川普在 2020 年大選期間操縱選票的陰謀論辯護,現在正面臨 27 億美元的訴訟。或者他的前經紀人和律師科恩(Michael Cohen),他因與川普有關的罪行被判入獄三年後,目前正在向調查川普的大陪審團提供證據。

這都是我們生活的後真相和缺乏問責制時代的一部分,我不願意看到這種感染在台灣獲得更大的立足點。

然而判斷錯誤一直都在發生,而且還會繼續發生。在英國和美國被稱為墨菲定律(Murphy’s Law),這個定律認為任何可能出錯的事情,都會出錯。

在我職業生涯的大部分時間裡,我都生活在商業世界中,工作上明確設定了目標,必須考慮如何實現該目標,並為所涉及的各個階段分配了各種負責任的人,他們必須對自己的職責和最終結果負責,無論是正面或是負面的結果。

在軍事俚語中,S.N.A.F.U(Situation Normal – All F**ked Up,或比較禮貌的 Situation Normal – All Fouled Up)字面上的翻譯是一切正常,但其實全都搞砸了,意思是天翻地覆的混亂狀況。

你不得不懷疑,當你看到一些政客和官員處理問題的明顯混亂方式時,他們是否懶惰不關心,或者其實他們只是想要掩蓋他們的留下的踪跡不要被察覺,以防萬一出現 S.N.A.F.U.

Monday, March 13, 2023

立法院

我加入路透社當菜鳥時剛剛解嚴不久,立法院開始大打出手,記憶猶新那是外國同事用來捉弄說笑的好武器,最好的回覆就是順著說笑皆大歡喜:對啊,這次打得不好,我要去抗議!你別惹我,我跟台灣國會議員一樣厲害!別的國會都學我們開打,不過我們還是比較猛! 但玩笑之餘,我也不忘急急說明反對黨如何得不到剛剛解嚴時的媒體的版面,如此下下之策可以理解,他們都是讀了很多書(咦是韓導嗎),很有理想的人等等。 過了解嚴之初的困境,媒體漸漸開放百家齊鳴,其實不太需要激烈肢體動作引起注意了,再有立法院打架事件總讓我覺得非常羞愧,此時反而是在台北的英國美國同事玩笑之餘反過來安慰,新興民主總是如此,台灣沒有經過流血革命政變走到這一步,在亞洲堪稱異數。 台灣什麼樣的亂象都還是會有,看看英國幾百年的民主,國會開議還跟演舞台劇一樣的傳統,每次看到都很羨慕人家那麼彬彬有禮跟BBC影集一樣,而如今英國的民主社會是何等荒謬!改天有空再來寫一篇。 在民主道路上台灣執政黨(不論是哪一黨)一定還是會跌跌撞撞,自然有許多不盡人意的地方,但是能夠因為民進黨以前大鬧國會,就一股腦說國民黨只是依樣畫葫蘆嗎?國民黨有228,民進黨執政了也可以來一個嗎?要不要規定學校不說台語就罰錢?如果願意去了解國民黨在台灣的所作所為,都不可能把任何一個政黨與其類比。檳榔黨雖然可惡,因為歷史環境,目前還沒有機會做到國民黨的罪孽深重。 國民黨執政的年代,年輕不懂事的我說支持民進黨是因為我要支持反對黨,有朝一日國民黨變成反對黨,我還是支持反對黨!漸漸我知道不管國民黨在什麼位置,都無法同情。歷史包袱放在一邊,這幾天國民黨的作為,已經超越了正常人可以接受的程度,從陳雪生到陳玉珍到咬人的那個誰,這樣杯葛議事,讓台灣在世界上蒙羞。 然而支持民進黨,就被認定為1450或是執政黨的內外宣,說穿了只是不喜歡對民進黨的支持罷了。也有可能說一樣爛,只是要掩飾對國民黨的不捨,失望或是尷尬而已。

學歷

講古又來了,我發這種文都是故意的。 當年我還在新加坡工作,已經準備搬去澳洲,不過我這輩子沒考過托福GRE什麼的,管它的,申請就是了。 結果學校來信說需要托福成績,當年是這樣現在不知道。我想了一下覺得很麻煩,因為我就是重考生啊,北一女畢業也考不上公立學校,考試成績可以想像。於是直接打電話去新南威爾斯大學國際關係研究所,轉了幾個人,終於轉到似乎是可以做主的人。 我解釋了我沒有托福成績,也不想浪費時間去考,聊了幾句,對方很爽快地說,妳的英文沒問題,不必附托福成績。 就這樣我就去讀研究所了,我去讀研究所純粹因為不知道離開路透社之後要幹嘛,就先讀個書再想想。為什麼申請新南威爾斯?只因為我會住在雪梨市中心。很高興這麼多年後學歷可以拿出來支持我的論點如下。 對我而言,學歷完全無用,不知道為什麼有人會炫耀自己是北一女台大榜首第一名斐陶斐,還要秀手機殼 🙄🙄🙄 喔忘了那個最重要我台大醫科的,我住過美國一年。。。TMD 全都滾啦,一群不知道哪裡來的夜郎 🙄🙄🙄🙄

Tuesday, January 3, 2023

Political Belligerence

 The Post-Truth era, in which we all now exist, it seems we have to also get used to a heightened level of political aggression and game-playing. Politicians are apparently happy to take greater risks with outright lies, half-truths, misdirection and gaslighting. 

In my four decades of writing about politics in many different countries, I can’t remember a time when shameless dishonesty was so rife. Sadly, many seem to be getting away with it and like a child with a new toy are delighting in it as it appears to make little, or no, difference to their political standing. 

It seems like a revelation to them, and they are revelling in it. It has emboldened some to behave as they like and take even greater political risks with their lies. 

"All is fair in love, war and politics", is a much used proverb when discussing the machinations which go on in the political world. While deeply cynical, it is nonetheless at least partly true. 

Look at former US president Donald Trump. His litany of years of lies and bad behaviour - not least the Big-Lie that the 2020 election was stolen from him - has gradually descended into unbalanced ravings. His call for the US Constitution to be torn up so he can be simply reinstalled into the White House, is as outrageous as it is mindblowing.

Happily his antics look like they are finally backfiring on him and President Biden now leads Trump in a head-to-head matchup, 47 percent to 40 percent. Plus, Two-thirds of Republican and Republican leaning voters want Florida Governor Ron DeSantis to run for President in 2024. (Personally I’m not sure which one is worse, but that’s another matter.)

But such behaviour has emboldened the likes of Republican Kari Lake to flatly refuse to accept she lost the 2022 Arizona governor race to Democrat Katie Hobbs, a move which led one US publican to describe her as the “saddest dead-ender” and someone who has “doubled down on a losing bet: election denial.” 

There are others like gun-toting Republican Colorado representative Lauren Boebert, notorious for fueling anti-LGBTQ+ bigotry, support for the Big-Lie and being an insurrectionist sympathiser. Likewise Georgia Republican representative the crazy Marjorie Taylor Greene with her Space Lasers, Political Murders, and Muslims Taking Over America. All truly bizarre stuff if you can be bothered to check into what exactly she said. 

Take the brutish Boris Johnson in the UK. His bravado and disdain for the public led to him telling lie after lie, a strategy which eventually caught up with him and he was deposed as leader of the ruling Conservatives. He is still under investigation by a Commons committee over whether he misled the UK Parliament.

Again, this has bred contempt for the truth with Secretary of State Michael Gove claiming the UK had secured GBP800 billion in “new free trade deals'' since leaving the European Union.

Which is a blatant misrepresentation of the facts because the bulk of this figure is not “new” trade and he has since been reprimanded by The UK Statistics Authority (UKSA) which has warned the ruling Conservatives that they should provide sources for such figures in the future.     

These are just recent examples of shameless dishonesty in politics which have ‘come home to roost’ but it is nevertheless a worrying trend that such outrageous behaviour is on the rise and lying is becoming ‘part of the political game’.

It’s easy to identify such trends here in Taiwan with some politicians feeling it is OK to ape some of the more outrageous behaviour we are witnessing abroad. That’s not to say it is anything new, but it does seem such practices are on the rise.

For example Terry Guo who has said Taiwanese people have no choice of which Covid vaccine they have, which is a clear lie. He also said the Government didn’t care whether people lived or died during the pandemic which I would class as not only a lie but also the dirtiest of political game playing. Of course the government cares whether people live or die.   

While the atrocious behaviour of the likes of Trump and Johnson did catch up with them in the end, it nevertheless propelled them to power in the first place and for a while afterwards they made political capital out of it.  

Politics is a dirty business, and, like boxing, is aggressive, confrontational and sometimes nasty but should be played to a set of rules. Outright lies, misdirection and gaslighting should play no part in a civilised society.    

Which brings us to the opposite situation. What happens when politicians act in a decent way, are broadly honest and try to behave in a respectful way towards voters? The answer is they  tend to lose out to those who think they can behave badly and break the unwritten rules and maybe even appear to be weak. 

There really needs to be an element of fighting fire with fire, with lies quickly called out just as aggressively as they were told in the first place. That is not something I see happening often in Taiwan. The government response to recent outrageous comments have been left unanswered for hours, sometimes days by which time the lie, or comment, is planted firmly in people’s minds and it is too late. 

Winston Churchill once said “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” 

At least responding to that lie quickly lessens its impact and maybe stops it in its tracks. Waiting hours to come back with a rebuttal is simply not good politics.

It’s also noticeable that the current administration appears not to think too hard about the way they deliver their messages. An excellent example of this is their latest budget announcement on Facebook.

It led with TWD111 billion to pay back government debt and towards the end it announced TWD577.3 billion more local government spending and more cash for education, infrastructure, defence and environment. 

This was a golden opportunity to lead with the good news of more spending on all the things people care about and push the budget payback to the bottom, or even not have it as part of the highlights at all. It would have been the smart way to handle it politically. 

But it backfired hugely as people latched on to the relatively small 111 billion figure and likely didn’t even read down far enough to find the much bigger 577.3 billion figure before they waded in with criticism. It even broke the first rule of journalism which is to lead with the bigger more important figure. 

That’s just one example but it’s fairly typical of the DPP and its somewhat passive approach to politics. Plus, the opposition parties are far more aggressive and emboldened in the Post-Truth era by the behaviour they see tolerated elsewhere in the world. 

With a presidential election just over a year away the current administration should perhaps think harder about their apparently relaxed and passive stance on the political battlefield and take a close, hard look at the way they make better political capital out of their successes.

Tinkerty Tonk... 

Saturday, November 26, 2022

For Sale

For Sale


Mayoral Clown Car

 (no longer required by owner)


Eight years old.
High mileage. 
Bodywork in poor shape after heavy use.
Seats in bad condition due to high constant high occupancy.
No seat belts.
Indicators not working.
Steering requires attention.
Would consider part-exchange for Clown Campaign Bus.



Tinkerty Tonk...

Thursday, November 10, 2022

Corrupt, or just a childlike simpleton out to insult us

I don’t know if you have caught any of my recent pieces on various political shenanigans, but as the days go by I seem to be undergoing a shift in my emotional response, in terms of the way I view them.

The cat still flies up to the ceiling and gets angry, but to be honest I think I left anger behind months ago. I’ve moved from anger at the outright corruption, through incredulity at the utter shamelessness, and am now settled in a bleak despair at examples of behavior more suited to an attention seeking eight year old. 

Even this is now giving way to a feeling of being downright insulted by the transparent stunts these people actually think we will fall for. They really do seem to believe we have all just fallen-off a Christmas Tree, and they have given up even trying to be a little bit clever. 

A 38 year-old Ann Kao had the affront to emerge from a medical facility with an IV line still attached to her arm. Oh, and the sleeve of her baggy shirt conveniently rolled back to make sure all the cameras caught that she had been made so terribly ill by the criticism she brought on herself through her shameless and entitled behavior. As sad stunts go, it was a doozy.

It’s hard to conceive a more obvious antic to garner sympathy in a pathetic attempt to distract from her petty cash scam, moonlighting and not giving proper credit in a doctoral university paper. Of course, the rest of the TMD misfits lined up to defend her, but that is normality in the clown-car of deviants the party is.

They are laughing at us, and really do appear to think we are all so dumb as not to see through such simplistic and childlike games. I feel insulted, and I’m sure you do too.

Grow up guys, at least make a bit of an effort, you really are embarrassing yourselves now. 

Tinkerty Tonk…  

Friday, November 4, 2022

The dire state of British politics

I left the United Kingdom 25 years ago on a day when there was a profound transformation in British politics as Tony Blair’s Labour Party swept away John Major’s Conservatives with a landslide 179 seat majority on May 1, 1997. This put an end to 18 years of Conservative Party rule (note: The Conservative Party is also known as the Tory Party, they are one and the same.)    

My posting to Asia had been delayed because Reuters Editors’ wanted me to stay in the UK to help cover election night as I was then part of the political reporting team. So I left the London newsroom direct to Heathrow for Asia after election night and as Blair headed to Buckingham Palace to meet with Queen Elizabeth II for royal assent to form a new Government. I have not lived in the UK since. 

As the political cycle ebbed and flowed, there was a switch back to the Conservatives in 2010, who managed to just about scrape an election victory based on forming a coalition with the Liberal Democrats, so they were still not wildly popular.

We now seem to be witnessing an echo of 1997 with the Conservatives again deeply unpopular and riddled by chaos, scandal, economic mismanagement and an almost complete lack of party unity across a wide range of policy issues, but mostly membership of the European Union which for decades has split the Tories. It has torn many political careers to shreds. 

Rishi Sunak is now the fifth Party Leader/therefore Prime Minister, since the Brexit referendum in 2016. By any analysis, Brexit has been fundamental to the Conservative Party meltdown as the far right Europe-hating wing of the party openly battled with moderates and party discipline disintegrated.

Theresa May’s abject failure to persuade the party to rally behind her Brexit plan, Johnson’s apparent lies and disastrous Brexit deal culminated in his resignation over scandals too numerous to list here, and now Liz Truss’s disastrous 44 day dismal failure at leadership has left both the party and opinion polls in tatters.

Truss now owns the cringingly embarrassing ‘honour’ of being Britain’s shortest ever serving Prime Minister. The previous shortest time served was Tory Prime Minister George Canning, who died after just 119 days in office in August 1827.

Most of the current political carnage can be traced back to the 2016 referendum on whether the UK should remain in the European Union which split the country in two with the result only just coming down on the side of Brexit by 52 percent to leave and 48 percent to remain.

It took four long and acrimonious years until a deal was eventually thrashed out for Britain to leave Europe. The hard-right of the Conservative Party continuously pushed for a hard uncompromising ‘walk-away’ deal which created divisions in the party and eventually destroyed the Premiership of Teresa May. David Cameron resigned as Tory leader just after the referendum.

The slow but steady economic damage done by the Brexit deal is now all too evident with the UK’s trade performance recently falling to its worst level since records began, heaping more downward pressure on sterling and upward pressure on interest rates. This was made far worse by a mini-budget under Liz Truss which was quickly unwound but not until it has done even more damage to the economy. 

There has, of course, been the background factors of Covid, the war in Ukraine and subsequent rise in energy costs, but all this has been made worse by Brexit. The sunlit uplands promised by the leave campaign have not come, nor will they. It is obvious to those of even the meanest intelligence that leaving the EU was not a good idea. 

Tory backer and billionaire businessman Guy Hands last week warned the government he supports that is putting the UK “on a path to be the sick man of Europe”, predicting higher taxes and interest rates and fewer social services.

The longtime Coservative supporter called for a renegotiated Brexit otherwise Britain is “frankly doomed”.

The Conservative party “needs to move on from fighting its own internal wars and actually focus on what needs to be done in the economy”, he said in a radio interview.

Britain’s political woes do not just stem from Brexit or the mishandling of events like Covid and Ukraine, but a force far more fundamental and worrying is at play here. That is the level of talent within the ranks of the government’s Members of Parliament. 

“It’s not so much a talent pool,” commented one radio journalist last week. “It’s more of a talent puddle.”

The analogy is a good one. When the Tories were stupid enough to elect Liz Truss as their leader there were many across the media, politics and the public at large pointing out she was a lightweight, was overpromising, had no real substance and would crash and burn in a job she was so clearly not capable of doing. Just 44 days later they were all proved right. 

On the face of it, Rishi Sunak looks a better bet and is way more level-headed than Truss, but his party is nevertheless facing political oblivion according to the latest polls of voting intentions. 

Politico’s Poll of Polls has Keir Starmer’s opposition Labour party on 53 percent with the Conservatives on 22 percent. An election tomorrow would see the Tories all but wiped out.

Former Conservative Party campaign director Mark Neeham said last week “If current opinion polling is correct, Labour will have 500 seats at the next election and the Tory party will be reduced to 48,” he told Sky News host Chris Kenny. There are a total of 650 UK Members of Parliament.

The government does not have to face a general election until January 2025 and they are clearly hoping to turn things around before then. But the general public are sick of them and there are growing calls for an earlier election basically because Sunak is not seen as having a  solid mandate because he was not voted in by the public, or even the around 175,000 card carrying members of the Conservative party.

He had already lost a leadership challenge to Liz Truss and was simply ushered in as leader because he was the only candidate who gained the required 100 supporters among the 357 Conservative MPs. You can see just how shallow the tallent puddle is!

The British public is clearly sick of the constant lies, gaslighting and fantasy economics of the current government and Liz Truss with her pathetic 44 day shelf-life has been, for many, the final straw. 

Less and less people are believing that ‘things will get better’ or ‘we will fix things’ and the empty rhetoric is all sounding increasingly hollow and, frankly, pathetic.

Every voter in every democracy should look at the state of Britain now and reflect that when they hear their own politicians speak and question what they hear. Are they lying, gaslighting, full of empty or impractical promises or, frankly, just plain stupid and lacking in talent? 

Are your politicians swimming in a pool, or a puddle? 

“You can fool all of the people some of the time, you can fool some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time,” is a quote long attributed to Abraham Lincoln in around 1860.

It would seem that the vast majority of the Great British public is no longer being fooled. 

Tinkerty Tonk...

Tuesday, November 1, 2022

On the back foot - desperate politics

Politics is a game, albeit a very serious game because it potentially affects millions of ordinary people. But it is a game, and that is something voters quite often lose sight of.

Whether politicians play the game well is open to question. To my mind here is the latest example of someone playing it very badly and perhaps should be considering another career.   

When those playing start to say things that are simply not true, or a bent version of the truth, it really needs immediate push back before it can sow seeds of doubt among those who do not have the time to follow domestic or international affairs closely enough.

The latest, and most blatant, example of this kind of behaviour is the opposition calling the former Health Minister in his bid to become Taipei Major a “Murderer” over the way the handled the Covid crisis. 

Just how absurd do you have to be, or how stupid a politican, to say something so idiotic and so blatently untrue? 

The attacks reached a new high recently when Huang Shanshan angrily criticised former Health Minister, now Mayoral Taipei mayoral candidate Chen, as failing in his efforts to protect Taiwan citizens from Covid and accusing him of corruption in deploying the vaccine. Also, she became more unhinged by saying "If anyone does this, he will be punished by God, watching people die and seeing people hurt but feeling indifferent."

This is clearly an absurd rant and a rather pathetic attempt to play political games. It smacks of desperation and is the politics of the madhouse.

It also comes from someone who refused to pick up phone calls from the Minister at the height of Covid when she was the pandemic coordinator for Taipei City . This is supposedly a responsible politician who is seeking higher office?    

Before we get into the numbers which easily disprove such utter nonsense, let’s reflect for a moment the mindset of those with all the facts and numbers at their disposal who make such a statement. Let’s remember that accusing someone of being a ‘murderer’ is the most extreme form of defamation as the crime is pubilshable by death in Taiwan.

At the time of writing, Taiwan has lost 10,950 lives to Covid, the United Kingdom has lost 207,000. Adjusting for population, roughly the UK has three times the population of Taiwan, you have a comparison of 69,000 vs Taiwan’s 11,000. That is just 16 percent of the UK number.

Looking wider, deaths per million of population are currently around 826 for the world as a whole, with Peru topping the list at 6,421 deaths per million. Taiwan is at 127 from the top on the  list of 219. The United States is 20th worst, UK 23rd, European Union 34th and Germany 61st. China appears on this list in 213th place with three reported deaths per million of its 1.4 billion people, which is, by pure coincidence, near North Korea at 215th place which has reported a similarly low figure of zero per million!

Setting aside the obvious anomalies inherent in such lists which do not take into account methodology of data gathering, or indeed honesty, it is clear Taiwan, and by implication Chen himself, has done a fine job in steering the country through the pandemic.

I rode out the bulk of the pandemic in Taiwan with no restrictions on my movement, no lockdowns and really no inconvenience other than having to wear a facemask. Compare this to my friends in the UK who had to endure weeks of virtual imprisonment in their own homes,   being questioned by police if they were seen on the street and being fined if they did not have an adequate excuse for being outside. 

I had many conversations from those who wished they were in a country which was handling the pandemic sensibly and in a better way. Not to mention the huge economic damage the likes of the UK did to their economy by preventing people from going to work and the sheer waste of billions of pounds on their inept, and failed, Track and Trace scheme. 

In all these respects Taiwan stood head-and-shoulders above a G7 country and the world’s fifth largest economy with its huge resources in its handling of the pandemic. I would say it is impossible to say Taiwan, and the Health Minister, did not do a spectacularly good job.     

Just how politically desperate do you have to be to level such an appalling accusation at someone? Answer, as desperate as an opposition bereft of ideas and trying so hard to find fault as to resort to the rhetoric of the libellous and of the gutter, to try and score political points.

It is sad and depressing to see those vying for high political office are so wretched and have such low morals they cannot bring themselves to be honest and admit the former Health Minister did a good job during Covid and their ridiculous accusations are both weak and pathetic.

The simple facts are there for all to see and anyone can quickly Google them.  

It also puts fully on display the ineptness of their political acumen. Why not pick on his other faults rather than resort to lies? Why not criticise his policies rather than call him ridiculous names, why not come up with some alternative policies than his rather than froth at the mouth and yell “Murderer.” Particularly when it isn’t true. You know it, and worse for you, the public knows it. 

To those involved in this latest piece of nonsense, some advice. It doesn’t work, it never has, and it will not in the future and you are insulting the public. Lose the election by all means, but please just be a bit smarter about trying to win it and not bore us all with these inane and unwarranted attacks.

Tinkerty Tonk...


Thursday, September 22, 2022

Hubris ahoy - another one crashes onto the rocks

We have attractive wooden beams on the ceilings in France so the cat’s claws have been firmly embedded in 300 year-old wood rather than the usual ceiling fan in Taipei. 

The reason for the latest bout of feline fury is the hapless Gao Hongan who seems to think the happenstance of going to a certain university seems to give her the right to belittle others. 

It’s highly entertaining when monumentally empty-headed politicians give us a virtuoso performance of arrogance, only to fall flat on their face. 

In an act akin to dozing off while driving a car at 130kph and expecting no consequences, Gao went sleepwalking into a fusillade of criticism over the pompous and self-important assertion that somehow anyone who went to Chung Hua University was somehow a lesser being.

Aside from the ins-and-outs of this particular affray it staggers me that someone seeking political office would say such things out-loud and in public. Just how dumb do you have to be to not to expect any blowback of criticism? 

What makes this case even worse is the fact she quickly got an onion out to force fake tears on TV sobbing people were getting at her. 

Amid accusations of bullying over what she said, the Taipei Mayor who, amazingly, managed to insult every victim of rape alive in the world today by comparing this ridiculous unimportant political spat to one of the worst crimes on the planet. 

Very well done Mayor, you just proved you are even dumber than Gao, although this kind of crassness and stupidity is what we have all long-ago come to expect from you. You don’t have to keep proving that you are unfit to run a bath, let alone anything that affects the public. 

Roll-on November. 

Sensible politicians, and by that I mean good politicians, have the breathtaking ability to actually think for a nano-second before they speak. UK politicians, for example Borish Johnson and Liz mis-Truss would never dream of openly boasting they went to Oxford, the top British university, as they know they would be ripped to shreds by the public who revile pomposity in all its forms. 

People with an ounce of sense could never vote for people who display such boundless arrogance. If they have no ability to think about the consequences of their utterances, muchless the consequences of their actions, if they do gain political power, they are clearly unfit for any public office.  

To cast a vote in their favour risks putting a poisoner in charge of a jam factory. 

Tinkerty Tonk…

Diplomacy in overdrive at the royal funeral

The fictional aide Bernard Woolley in the
long running series Yes, Prime Minister
 

British diplomats and officials were battling with the rare challenge of assembling a vast  number of foreign dignitaries in one place at short notice for the funeral of Queen Elizabeth II, Britain's longest-reigning monarch. 

It has been not unlike herding cats as the niceties of diplomacy have made it almost an impossible task without upsetting at least some of the invited VIPs.

Obviously, the invites were all sent at short notice and to plan ahead of time for who, where they would sit and how they would travel has been a massive headache due to the ever changing flux of global events and diplomacy. 

It has been 57 years since Britain’s last state funeral of former UK prime minister and wartime leader Winston Churchill and the world is a very different place now.

Around 500 presidents, prime ministers, kings, queens, emirs and other world dignitaries were invited.   

Probably the easiest call was not to invite Russian President Vladimir Putin because of Ukraine and the savage sanctions the UK has slapped on his country. Putin ally Belarusian President Aleksandr Lukashenko was similarly not on the guestlist. 

Despite Putin being almost a global pariah, a Russian official said it was "deeply immoral" the UK snubbed Putin. Although Putin did send King Charles III a telegram wishing him "courage and perseverance in the face of this heavy, irreparable loss."

China’s President Xi Jinping was on the guest list although there was uproar amongst some British Members of Parliament when this became known, who described the decision as “extraordinary”. 

Xi decided not to attend but Vice President Wang Qishan will attend the funeral.

Saudi Arabia's crown prince Mohammed Bin Salman was invited but did not attend. His visit would hvae been controversial because of the murder of journalist and Saudi critic Jamal Khashoggi in 2018. 

More recently, Saudi Arabia sentenced Nourah bint Saeed al-Qahtani to 45 years in prison and Salma al-Shehab, a 34-year-old PhD student at Leeds University and mother of two to 35 years for comments they made on social media which were deemed as illegal as they criticised the regime. This caused much controversy in the UK and the media made much play of the fact the new King Charles III has close ties with Saudi Arabia.

The ever controversial Islamic Republic of Iran, long the subject of international sanctions over its nuclear programme, received a partial invite and was represented only at ambassadorial level.

Others not on the guestlist include Syria, Venezuela and Afghanistan as the UK does not have full diplomatic relations with the three and Myanmar were also not invited broadly because of the recent coup d'etat and attendant human rights abuses.

The Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK) and Nicaragua had been invited to send only ambassadors, not heads of state. Britain has diplomatic issues with both countries.

However, the guestlist is a fairly easy side of the funeral’s diplomatic conundrum.

To show off its green credentials the UK government also asked VIPs to limit their numbers of delegates and consider commercial flights to reduce congestion at Heathrow. It’s certain this would have annoyed those with private jets they are more used to scooting about in. 

Then there are the buses, yes buses. President Joe Biden has been allowed to bring his mammoth armoured car - better known as The Beast - but other dignitaries have been asked to jump out of their private cars at a meeting point and then climb aboard buses to the service at Westminster Abbey. 

It looks like this request created more than a bit of an uproar as a British prime minister’s official spokesman insisted arrangements for leaders would “vary depending on individual circumstances” and that the information provided was “guidance.” Obviously it was a step too far for many countries, most notably Japan. 

Japanese Emperor Naruhito and Empress Masako broke protocol and attended the funeral, as a measure of the close ties he and his family enjoyed with the late Queen Elizabeth. Although I find it hard to imagine the Emperor and Empress climbing aboard a bus with a bunch of other invitees. 

Then, not least, there are the seating arrangements in Westminster Abbey which can hold around 2000 people. South Korea sitting next to Japan, perhaps not! Pakistan and Afghanistan, er no! US and Mexico, maybe not the best idea! Israel and pretty much any Middle Eastern country, no, no! India and Pakistan, definitely not!

There are, of course many, many more and diplomats would have been working long into the night to get the seating arrangements right. 

In fact this exact situation was the subject of a very popular and long-running TV series which ran in the 1980s called Yes Prime Minister which parodied the workings of the British Parliament.

In the episode ‘A Diplomatic Incident’ which amply demonstrates the changing nature of geopolitics, the death of fictional Prime Minister Jim Hacker's predecessor provides a chance for some negotiations with France over the Channel Tunnel at his state funeral.

One scene has his hapless and harried aide, Bernard Woolley, is shouting down the phone “Yes there are about 10 Prime Ministers flying in today, Special Branch are going crazy, so is the band of the Royal Marines who have got to play all the national anthems. It’s lucky Argentina isn’t coming,  not because of the Falklands (War) but because their anthem goes on for about 10 minutes”.

From the same scene. “No we can’t have alphabetical seating in the Abbey, you’d have Iraq and Iran sitting next to each other, plus Israel and Jordan all sitting in the same pew. You’d be in danger of starting World War III.”

Taiwan said its representative in London, Kelly Wu-Chiao Hsieh, was “specially invited” to sign the condolence book at Lancaster House, which is run by the UK Foreign Office.  

The Taiwan Foreign Ministry said the invitation came “based on the importance attached to Taiwan-Britain relations and the precious friendship between the two peoples”. 

The ministry noted Hsieh “enjoyed the same treatment as the heads of state, representatives and members of the royal family of other countries who have gone to Britain to mourn”.

Tinkerty Tonk...

Friday, September 9, 2022

When ego takes over

Schadenfreude is a German word which has no equivalent in English. It means ‘pleasure derived by someone from another person's misfortune’ and perfectly sums up my feeling when I see those with huge egos and full of entitlement make fools of themselves in public.

When the likes of actors, singers or sports personalities say or do something stupid, one can forgive them as is it is generally understood that, to them, any publicity is good publicity. 

Even if they make themselves look like an utter dofus, it is of little consequence to anyone and usually has zero impact on anyone else. By definition of what they do for a living, simply means they are for entertainment purposes only.  

But when a politician allows their arrogance and ego to get the better of them in public it has deeper implications for the rest of us. Although it’s still funny to watch and schadenfreude really kicks in.

Enter KMT Chairman Eric Chu who made the courageous decision recently to do a sit-down  interview with German international broadcaster Deutsche Welle (DW). I’m not sure what he, or his press office, was thinking when they agreed this, but they seemed to assume he would be given the kind of easy ride the local Taiwan media would have given him. 

I guess neither of them bothered to do any research or watch any other recent DW interviews which would have quickly revealed their reporters can be quite feisty and well prepared when questioning politicians. 

Nevertheless, Chu’s minders whipped off the blindfold and sent him tottering into a minefield where he proceeded to step on pretty much every single one. At first, I felt a bit sorry for him as he was clearly out of his depth, but then my schadenfreude sparked-up and I began to enjoy the spectacle. 

Having made his biggest mistake, which was turning up in the first place, it was not long before he was bereft of meaningful answers and lapsed into the waffly style with which he deals with local media, as well as speaking over the interviewer. 

He compounded this with long, rambling and obvious answers, and without really saying anything he struggled through the slow-motion car crash appearance. 

When questioned about the recent NCCU popularity poll putting the KMT on 14 percent versus the DPP at 31.1 percent and the Taipei Mayor's Party on 7.8 percent he reacted with “Don’t give us any wrong information you get from the poll,” going onto say KMT polls show the party rising and confidently forecast “our party will win the election.”

Immediately after, he sensibly decided that it was not going well and like a pilot on a burning aircraft he bailed out with a “thank you, our time is up.’’

I interviewed many politicians and businessmen during my journalistic career and not unreasonably expected them to be as well prepared as I was, and not insult me by waffling or stating the blindingly obvious.

Taiwan Media generally bears little relation to International Media and it is sometimes very obvious that some politicians here really do not understand this. When a boxer climbs into the ring he knows what his opponent is capable of and what the risk is of being beaten senseless.  

Politicians here are generally given a fairly easy ride by the local media who are either on their side, or are not good at formulating questions that really get to the heart of the matter at hand. So you have politicians who feel they can be off-hand with the media, and a media that does not seem to have the authority to hold them properly to account. 

Another background factor evident in this particular interview was the fact the KMT still believes it is the rightful government of Taiwan simply by dint of history and the fact they were in power for so long. In the west the collective noun for such groups is ‘The Establishment’.

This is a term first coined in the 1950s by  British journalist Henry Fairlie, who said, “By the Establishment, I do not only mean the centres of official power, though they are certainly part of it, but rather the whole matrix of official and social relations within which power is exercised.

The KMT are very much The Establishment in Taiwan, and are not yet used to being out of power and so unpopular. Given they ruled under martial law from 1949 to 1987 it is no real surprise that actions during those years have left a legacy which considerably underpins the political power they wield in terms of who their rich and influential friends are.

They are no longer top-dog but continue to display an arrogance and ego which seems to make them believe the DPP is just temporary noise that will soon go away.

So I guess this is why they feel they can turn up for an interview so obviously ill-prepared, then try to control the narrative rather than answer questions properly, and then stand up and leave when it does not go their way. 

The other thing to bear in mind is that to turn up for an organisation like DW and make such a hash of it only serves to make Taiwan look foolish abroad, and that is an important issue given the global attention Taiwan is getting at the moment.   

Trotting out tired old platitudes just doesn't cut it. You might be able to get away with it with local media, but when talking to international media you really need something new to say. 

Alternatively, politely decline such interview requests until you feel confident enough, or have something to say, or feel you can think quickly enough on your feet to pull it off. 

Tinkery Tonk...  

Saturday, September 3, 2022

My home country is in the shit - literally

You will likely be reading this before the outcome of the UK ruling Conservative Party leadership election on Monday, although the outcome is pretty much assured, with the current Foreign Minister Liz Truss the solid favourite to take over as Prime Minister.

She will take on the seemingly unenviable job of sorting out the dire mess that Britain has become after years of government mis-managment, mainly by the right-wing Conservative party, with a laundry list of damaging policy mis-steps and failures, lies, gaslighting and contempt for the public. All of which prompted the sacking of Prime Minister Boris Johnson who loses his job after this weekend. 

Britain is currently suffering from an acute cost-of-living crisis with inflation running at just over 10 percent in August, the highest in 40 years and also the highest among The Group of Seven (G7) nations. 

A good chunk of this is due to energy prices which have shot up across Europe driven by a spike in demand as countries lifted Covid pandemic lockdowns, compounded by the war in Ukraine as Russian oil and gas exports have been cut back.

But Britain has some unique factors which are making things worse, namely labour shortages as foreign workers left the UK when it pulled out of the European Union (Brexit) and additional taxes on households.

Britain’s debt now stands at just over 100 percent of Gross Domestic Product compared with around 70 percent in 2010 when the current Conservative administration regained power. With a chunk of that due to the now infamous failed Track and Trace system put in place during the pandemic. 

The government blew a colossal 37 billion pounds on the system over two years, which a scathing report by a Westminster spending watchdog described as swallowing up “unimaginable” amounts of taxpayers’ money with no evidence of any measurable difference on the progress of the pandemic. 

Despite this eye-watering spending, track and trace failed in its task of preventing the second and third lockdowns, found a cross-party House of Commons Public Accounts Committee. Committee chair Meg Hillier demanded better control of costs, accusing the government of treating taxpayers “like an ATM machine”.

There are an ongoing series of strikes across Britain by railway, postal, rubbish collectors and even barristers all striking for better pay. As if all this is all not enough, raw-sewage is being pumped in the rivers and surrounding seas due to underinvestment in the now privatised water companies sold off by the Conservative Party government in the late 1980s. There are now fifty beaches in the UK where swimming is banned…Which explains my headline. 

Why am I telling you all this? The reason is that even fully developed nations can find themselves in an awful mess if an electorate allows itself to be duped by unscrupulous  politicians or allows itself to be lied to, blinded by false promises or gives itself up to unthinking political dogma, the so-called ‘red meat’ that politicians throw at the public to gain votes.

This is exactly what has happened in my home country and serves as a warning to other free democracies that career politicians whose main motivation is to gain power and influence, all the trappings of power and influence, a place in the history books, a generous government pension and an easy lucrative job for life hiring themselves out as consultants or speech makers.

There are dozens of examples of this pattern. In this style of life equation, consideration of the living conditions and quality of life of the electorate at large comes a very poor second. The UK is living proof of this with the exit of Boris Johnson who is already churning out opinion pieces for the right-wing press in the UK and lining his own pockets.

Johnson was ultimately undone not by policy disagreements but by his own character failings. When he was elected 32 percent of people thought he would be a good Prime Minister and 32 percent a bad one, 36 percent were undecided. In the latest YouGov Poll 25 percent thought he had done well, 68 percent thought he had done badly, with just seven percent undecided. 

This is in just over the three years he was in power and two years away from a full term in government. Britain has a five year government term compared with Taiwan’s four years.   

There were myriad reasons I decided to leave the country of my birth 25 years ago and  unfortunately my gut feeling about how things were going then, have turned out to be not only  frighteningly accurate, but far worse than I imagined. Politicians with no moral compass were common then, now they seem to have reached plague proportions. 

The unedifying cat-fight between Rishi Sunak and Liz Truss for the top UK job exemplifies this, with both hurling promises around which are unaffordable, would damage and already weak economy or are just downright stupid. All they want is the top job and the consequences can go hang.

Pledges to slash taxes by Conservative leadership candidates are unrealistic unless they are matched by spending cuts. The Institute for Fiscal Studies (IFS) said large, permanent tax cuts could add to pressures on the public purse as the economic outlook deteriorates.

Both Rishi Sunak and Liz Truss have promised tax cuts but say their plans are affordable. They are both wrong, lying, or both. It is abundantly clear that all they want is the top job and are both paying lip service to reality in their quest for it.  

I don’t want to sound too cynical, but it’s hard not to be if you take the UK as an example of a democracy gone astray. What worries me is that my adopted country Taiwan has more than its fair share of loose-lipped, over promising, unrealistic and just plain stupid politicians.

Let’s take the Taipei Mayor who in 2014 said he was going to make Taipei surpass Singapore in eight years. Two years later he said it was impossible for Taipei to be like Singapore and that it should be more like the Netherlands. This week the Deputy Taipei Mayor said she would make Zhongxiao East Road like the Champs-Élysées in Paris.

Let’s just let that nonsense sink in for a few seconds…. 

Would anyone in their right mind take any of these statements seriously? Or believe them to be possible? Or believe it was necessary to achieve such a state of affairs? It is just politicians throwing ridiculous statements and promises around hoping the electorate will be fooled into voting for them. These are not serious people striving to improve living standards for ordinary people with realistic strategies over the longer term.  

Someone running for Taoyuan has said he will make the government pay for the downpayment for young people to purchase a flat. There are so many holes in such a ridiculous promise I hardly know where to start, plus the government would just tell him to get lost.

It’s just empty words in a cynical attempt to garner votes and empty vessels make the most noise. Vote for such people and you will end up with the kind of mess that ordinary Britons now find themselves in.

Please don’t fall for the kind of nonsense the British people did and don’t think that just because Taiwan is a fully developed and relatively rich country that it could not all go to hell-in-a-handcart if the wrong people gain power.

One of America’s  Founding Fathers Thomas Jefferson, statesman, diplomat, lawyer, architect and philosopher who served as the third president of the United States from 1801 to 1809 once famously said “The government you elect is the government you deserve.”

Britain, stupidly, gave Boris Johnson’s and the Conservate Party an overwhelming victory in 2019 at the height of Brexit fever….and are now deeply unhappy with the result, the country is being damaged and people are suffering. 

Britain’s recent experience is a stark reminder to beware believing the power hungry, the over-promisers, the popularist and the unrealistic. Choose wisely when you vote, your country’s future is in your hands and is depending on you to do the right thing.  

Tinkerty Tonk...

Sunday, August 14, 2022

Nursey - Stones, Pots, Kettles and Ditches

According to the Cat, the proverb - People in Glass Houses Shouldn’t Throw Stones - is exactly the same in Chinese. It is not often English and Chinese proverbs are exactly the same. 

There is another proverb in English which is - The Kettle Calling the Pot Black - which has a similar meaning in as much as... look at how black you might be yourself, before you criticise others.

It was actually good to see the cat laughing at the hole dear old Nursey has dug for herself with her ill-judged attack on the Hsinchu Mayor and the nonsense about his degree. 

(Personally, I blame the Professor and his arse-backwards way of dealing with it, plus the KMT biased establishment of Tai Da swinging into action in a rather pathetic attempt to damage the DPP.) At least, that’s how it looks on the face of it… 

All a bit sad for a University, presumably full of smart people, to manage to make itself look like an establishment puppet. But the likes of Oxford and Cambridge in the UK are part of the UK establishment, so it’s not dissimilar. (See here for my piece on The Establishment)       

The Cat tells me an online friend did all the hard work in terms of digging out the details of the  Naughty Nurse’s own thesis and did the cut-and-paste comparisons. So thanks to Secret Squirrel 2 as it made a change for me not to have to coax an angry Cat down from the ceiling, and see her laughing at this particular political farce instead.

It did bring to mind something that happened in my own career. I’m proud to say I was smart enough to head off the kind of mistake that Nursey has just made. 

I was in the London Reuters Newsroom on the day Germany’s Bundesbank was due to decide on its base lending rates. Tension was high, the markets were waiting, billions would change hands in financial markets..it was a big news flash.

The flash came from most news agencies…Rates Unchanged… Reuters flashed 30 seconds later.. German rates raised. 

Reuters got it right, the rest were wrong. It caused a considerable amount of turmoil in the financial markets and a lot of people lost a lot of money. 

I was part of the team involved in that particular news-break and the next day an excited young Reuters marketing guy came to see me about a full page advert they wanted to put in the Financial Times about how Reuters had got the Bundesbank rate right, and the opposition had got it wrong. 

I turned to my Reuters screen and typed in CORRECTED, and the screen filled up. 

“Mate,” I said. “Next week it will be us…please don’t do this.” 

We are all fallible. Most normal people realise that. Sometimes, perhaps, those who play political games think they are not human, are somehow special or somehow smarter and superior to the rest of us. 

They are not… 

A fall into a ditch makes you wiser… as the old Chinese proverb says.

Sadly, some in the political field are neither wise, or skilled in analytical thinking. 

My late Mother used to say “They don’t have the brains they were born with.” To my mind, that is true  wisdom.

Tinkerty Tonk    

Monday, August 8, 2022

Goldxilocks and the Three Bears

中文在下方

Once upon a time there were three bears... 

There was Daddy Bear, Mummy Bear and Baby Bear, who all lived peacefully and happily in the big forest. 

Daddy Bear was very rich and powerful and came from a part of the forest far away. 

He thought he was the most powerful in the whole forest, although it was full of other big and unfriendly animals. Some, nearly as powerful as he was.  

Mummy Bear was tiny in comparison, but Daddy Bear loved her very much. Although she had done well in life, she never really had a lot of money and had somewhat of a troubled past. But she was very feisty and always stood up to bullies. 

Baby Bear was called Democracy and try as he might, he could not help being constantly bullied and was forced to stand up for himself. Although he was only quite young in Bear years, having been born in 1987 and really didn’t know how to behave. He could sometimes be very naughty and not know his left from his right. 

Although Daddy Bear was rich and powerful, Mummy Bear worked very hard and was up early every day preparing special porridge with her secret added ingredient, microchips, which were very hot. She made the secret ingredient in a shed in the garden and she knew how good they were for Baby Bear and would make him grow big and strong.

The day after Daddy Bear’s Auntie Pelosi left from her visit, Baby Bear came down for breakfast. He sat down and tasted his porridge. “Yikes Mother,” he cried. “This is way too hot. I’d say there are around 70 percent of all the microchips in the forest in this. I think we should all go out for a walk and let it cool down.”

So Daddy Bear, Mummy Bear and Baby Bear all went for a walk in the forest while their microchip porridge cooled down, unaware that Auntie Pelosi had been gossiping on her way home from her visit. 

Meanwhile, Goldxilocks, who lived nearby in the forest, had heard of Auntie Pelosi’s visit and, despite warnings from her mother not to wander into the forest and make trouble, sneaked out of her house to see what was happening.

Goldxilocks arrived at the Bear’s cottage but found the door locked. But Goldxilocks was cunning and tricky and hacked a hole in the shutter and peeked in. She saw no one was home. 

She had some little forest friends with her who helped her get into the house. These were odd and nasty little creatures who lived with the Bears and, indeed, lived off of them, but were nevertheless willing to help Goldxilocks get into the house.

When Goldxilocks saw the microchip porridge she jumped for joy. She had wanted some microchip porridge for such a long time but had always struggled to make it properly and it never tasted right. 

She sat down and tried Daddy Bear’s porridge. “Yuck, too lumpy,” she said, because Daddy Bear preferred his porridge made with low grade and common microchips. 

Then she tried Mummy Bear’s porridge. “Humm, this is not bad but it is still too lumpy because while it has high-grade microchips, it also has low grade and common microchips.

Then she tried Baby Bear’s porridge. “Yummy,” she exclaimed. “This one is just right as it has loads of high grade microchips.” 

Goldxilocks looked around the Bear’s house and thought she might like to sit down. She saw Daddy Bear’s rocking-chair by the fire and thought she would try it. Little did she know that this was Daddy Bear’s very special chair which he sat in to work out how much trade he would do with the rest of the forest when he sold the things he had gathered in the forest and how much he would charge for them. 

As Goldxilock rocked back and forth in the trade chair there was a loud ‘crack’ and the chair broke. But Goldxilocks was very selfish and was now very sleepy and went upstairs to find somewhere to sleep. 

She could not sleep in Daddy Bear’s bed as it was too big and it made her feel nervous to lie on it. Mummy Bear’s bed was comfortable, but a little small. So she decided to lie on Mummy Bear’s bed and rest her feet on Baby Bear’s bed…that would do nicely.

Soon she was fast asleep dreaming of loads and loads of lovely microchip porridge when she heard the door downstairs open.

“Who’s been eating our porridge? The Bears cried. “And who’s broken my special trading chair,” yelled Daddy Bear. 

Daddy Bear rushed upstairs and saw Goldxilocks in bed. “Get out of my house,” he shouted. “And never come back.”

Goldxilocks ran back home and was roundly told off by her Mother (ie. the rest of the right thinking world) and sent to bed with no supper. 

Hopefully…

The end.

Tinktery Tonk...

很久很久以前森林裡住了三隻熊... 有熊爸爸、熊媽媽和熊寶寶,他們在大森林裡和平快樂地生活著。

熊爸爸非常富有強大,來自森林遙遠的一方。他認為他是整個森林中最強大的,儘管在那裡到處都是不友好的大動物,有些甚至幾乎和他一樣強大。

熊媽媽比較小,熊爸爸卻很愛她。 雖然生活過得不錯,但她熊媽媽從來沒有真正擁有過很多錢,也有過幾分坎坷的過去。 她一點也不畏懼強勢,面對霸凌者總是挺直腰桿。

熊寶寶的名字叫 Democracy,無論他多麼努力,他還是不斷地被欺負,被迫為自己挺身而出。 1987年出生的熊寶寶在熊界算是很年輕,言行舉止有些不穩,他有時很調皮,有時也會左右不分。

熊爸爸雖然有錢有勢,但熊媽媽卻很努力,每天早早起來,用她的秘方晶片 (microchips) 做熱騰騰的粥。 她在花園一角的棚子裡烹製了這種秘方粥,她知道這對熊寶寶很有幫助,會讓他長得又大又壯。

熊爸爸的阿姨裴洛西離開後的第二天,熊寶寶下樓來吃早餐。 他坐下來,嚐了一口他的粥。  “哎呀,媽媽,”他喊道。  “這太燙了。 我想這片森林裡大約有 70% 的晶片都在這裡吧? 我覺得我們都應該出去散散步,讓這個粥冷一下。”

於是,熊爸爸、熊媽媽和熊寶寶利用等待晶片粥冷卻的時間到森林裡去散散步,他們不知道其實裴洛西阿姨在她回家路上,還去了別的地方跟人閒聊。

因此住在森林附近被寵壞了的 Goldxilocks (註:原名為Goldilocks) 也聽說裴洛西阿姨的來訪,儘管她的母親警告她不要走進森林找麻煩,她還是偷偷溜出去看熱鬧。

Goldxilocks 到達熊家發現門鎖著,但狡猾的她在百葉窗上挖了一個洞往裡偷看,發現家裡沒有人,然後她有一些在森林裡的伙伴幫她進到三隻熊的家。這些奇怪而討厭的小動物雖然在森林裡和熊一起生活,但仍然願意幫助 Goldxilocks 進入房子。

看到晶片粥時,Goldxilocks 高興得跳了起來。 長時間以來,她一直想要吃晶片粥,但不管再怎麼努力,味道從來沒有好過。

她坐下來嚐了熊爸爸的粥。  “哎呀,太粗糙了,”她說。因為熊爸爸比較喜歡吃不精緻的食物。

然後她試了熊媽媽的粥。  嗯,這個還不錯,但是還是不夠細緻,因為晶片粥的材料有各種規格。

然後她吃了一口熊寶寶的粥。  “好吃,”她叫道。  “這個恰到好處,因為裡面是大量的高級晶片。”

吃過粥現在 Goldxilocks 想要坐下來了,她環顧四周,在火爐邊看到熊爸爸的搖椅。 她不知道這是非常特別的椅子,熊爸爸坐在上面計算他在森林裡收集的東西,要和森林的其他人做多少交易,以及他會收取多少費用。

Goldxilock 在交易椅上來回搖晃,忽然間發出一聲巨響,椅子壞了。 但是 Goldxilocks 是個很自私的人,她才不管,因為想睡了就上樓找地方睡覺。

熊爸爸的床太大了,躺在上面讓她感到緊張。 熊媽媽的床很舒服,就是有點小。 所以她決定躺在熊媽媽的床上,把腳放在熊寶寶的床上……這樣就好了。

當她聽到樓下的門打開時,她正夢見一大堆可愛的晶片粥。

“誰偷吃了我們的晶片粥?” 一家人在廚房大喊!  “誰弄壞了我的特殊交易椅,”熊爸爸氣壞了。

熊爸爸衝上樓,看到床上的 Goldxilocks。  “滾出我的房子,”他喊道。  “而且永遠不要再回來。”

Goldxilocks 慌慌張張跑回家,並被她的母親(正確思維世界的其他人)訓斥了一頓,沒有晚飯可以吃就被送進房間睡覺了。

結束。

Tinkerty Tonk… 掰掰。

Friday, August 5, 2022

The US and Asia - and Taiwan

There is a phrase in English ‘A Hostage to Fortune’ which means an undertaking or remark that is regarded as unwise because it invites trouble or could prove difficult to live up to.

As a journalist, I’ve always regarded making big predictions in opinion columns as unwise and making myself a Hostage to Fortune, because it’s easy to be proved wrong. 

That caveat out of the way, as a concerned resident I do feel the need to write down my thoughts on the latest shenanigans in - and indeed around - Taiwan. I also want to do this as I’m frankly embarrassed by much of the Media’s take on the Pelosi visit.

What many people tend to forget is the deeper background and history of a situation, either because they are ignorant of the facts, or because they have an agenda. 

It seems the United States attitude towards Taiwan has been bolstered by circumstance since President Jimmy Carter broke relations with the Republic of China in 1979 and defined officially substantial but non-diplomatic relations between the two.

The relationship was perhaps less important while the US still felt it was the undisputed leader and policeman of the free world as well as being economically head-and-shoulders above everywhere else. 

This pole-position has ebbed away in recent decades as other areas grabbed a larger share of global Gross Domestic Product and caught up with an America which was dogged not only by home grown crises like the 2008 housing crash but also by global events.

Watching the now organised might of the European Union, as well as China and India, catch up with it so strongly in terms of economic strength, must be a concern for the US if they are looking to hold onto their global political clout and influence. 

With economic power ebbing away, it is small wonder they look towards the still unassailable position their huge military affords them to retain global influence. The U.S. Armed Forces are by far the world's most powerful with a budget of around US$700 billion, accounting for around 35 percent of the world's total defence spending and three times its nearest rival.     

Only last Wednesday the Associated Press carried the following lead. “U.S. Senators delivered overwhelming bipartisan approval to NATO membership for Finland and Sweden Wednesday, calling expansion of the Western defensive bloc a “slam-dunk” for U.S. national security and a day of reckoning for Russian President Vladimir Putin over his invasion of Ukraine.”

With the US having the largest number of military personnel of all the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation (NATO) countries and so, by a long way, having the biggest influence, it is no wonder they described expanded membership as a “slam-dunk”.

That language alone pretty much demonstrates the US wants to retain its political power and authority in the world, and part of that is not just being in better shape to stand up to the likes of Russia, but elsewhere where threats remain.

The Americans have fought two major wars since WWII during the Cold War with the Soviets, obsentibly to stop the spread of communism. The Korean and Vietnamese Wars were aimed primarily at preventing the spread of communism, costing around 95,000 American lives and  well over 300,000 wounded. 

Has the world really changed that much for the United States to have collectively forgotten all those crippled and dead American souls to not fight for democracy and against the spread of communism now? 

Yes, the world has changed. Yes things are different now, but I have to wonder if the fundamentals that existed then have completely disappeared in the minds of ordinary Americans and that of the American Government.  

Also remember the moves by America after World War 2 (WWII) in constructing defensive lines across the Pacific stretching from Japan in the north, through Taiwan, South Korea, and the Philippines down across East Asia and the Pacific to Australia. This was all done with the possibility of future tensions in mind. Would the US just abandon such a long-standing commitment?

“We envision an Indo-Pacific that is open, connected, prosperous, resilient, and secure—and we are ready to work together with each of you to achieve it,” US President Joe Biden said at the East Asia Summit in October 2021.     

Nearly half the US military are deployed abroad, with around 80,000 American personnel overseas. Japan has 53,700 and South Korea 26,400. South Korea hosts Camp Humphreys, the largest overseas US military base, just 65km from Seoul.

Given the history and other recent tensions and worries over the situation in the South China Sea, is it any wonder the authorities in the world’s leading nation are taking a close interest in the perceived threat to Taiwan? This, particularly in the light of Ukraine and the tragedy of the aggression that is happening there. 

I think those who dismiss the Pelosi visit as just the United States trying to face-down another superpower and using Taiwan as a political pawn in some giant diplomatic chess game are not fully considering how the US has behaved in the past in Asia. Its fight against the spread of communism, its championing of democracy and its close relationship with Japan underline America’s commitment to the peace and stability in the Pacific region. 

On the US State Department website under an article headlined ‘U.S. Relations With Japan’ it says “Japan is one of the world’s most successful democracies and largest economies. The U.S.-Japan Alliance is the cornerstone of U.S. security interests in Asia and is fundamental to regional stability and prosperity. The Alliance is based on shared vital interests and values, including: the maintenance of stability in the Indo-Pacific region.”

I do wonder if those who suggest the US is just playing political games, or just trying to score points in an apparently growing Cold-War, or are somehow frightened of another superpower are mis-remembering the huge price America has paid in Asia in the past.

WWII saw America sacrifice 111,606 dead or missing and another 253,142 wounded in the war against Japanese imperialism in the Pacific. That, together with the subsequent wars against the spread of communism and their ongoing and vocal support of Pacific nations is enough to convince me the Pelosi visit is far from them just playing hollow diplomatic games. 

Tinkerty Tonk…